Fairview Cult Bulletin

This one you can read, but only if your a member of the Fairview

Cult. >o< small camera inserted in most bulletins has already

caught 17 non members reading bulletins so far.

People like stories here are things I did at malls some are storyworthy some are paragraph worthy, and some are sentence worthy,

But any way here they are all in sentences.

Waste Gate

Waldens-Held a book club meeting twice with friends reviewing cooking and other odd books usingtheir book pillows.-kicked out once.

Putting Pornoes in the self help section.

I read a whole book on how to do it. also read the Joy of how to do it but got kicked out before I finished it.

Got kicked out with my cousin for reading the book erotic art and he was reading a dirty mag.

Saw two homosexual satanic vampires, (something you don't see all the time.)

Victorias Secret- Went in acting like a physically handicapped, people working there just stared as started saying out loud "underwear". My cousin acted like my brother and pulled me out.

Went in saying I'm waiting for my girlfriend, then when they weren't looking posed as a manican in the window. Ran out when I saw her on the phone.

Record Town- Hid from mall security in the elevator.

Ganked a cardboard standee of a Dominican Monk in broad daylight, walked around in the mall with it, and talked to it.

Played spy in the elavator and all.

Aladdins castle- evrytime I'm a top scorer I put swear words for my name.(original)

Got 3 dollars worth of free tokens by keeping movie stubs from where I was working.

Food Court- When I complained they put onions on my burger when I asked'em not to, they apologized and gave me a new one then they put my 75% eaten quarter pounder back on the shelf. I was going to say something, but decided to let it go.

Hassled them enough to get me free stuff.

At that coffe place I was hitting on girlsby putting on a puppet show with the spawn action figures I just bought.

Asked for water and refilled it with pop.

Kohl's- Shot a manican in a wheel chair with a real looking cap gun in broad daylight. Was told to leave.

Bowed down in front of manican in wheel chair praising it.

Went upstairs and jumped on floor, and felt it shke because it's EarthQuake proof( works well when one friend jumps and other sits on the floor)

LongHorns- Took lots of free TeddyGrams, mints and matches. Was served by a guy who's eye bled from the inside. Took full advantage of Mall handouts of LongHorns Free Appetizers. Multiple times without buying anything else sometimes twice a day.

Just for Trendy Yuppies (laughs)

Asked person behind counter if I could walk out with this magnet set, the person then responded No My aunt owns the store. He then got mad and then started breathing really fast. I asked if we was okay he panted "yeah" then I walked out, with him still breathing heavilly.

Jewelry store- (hidden camera) Jumped up and whooped to advert attention from badly hidden camera. while my other friends tried to make the jewelry store to admit they were selling fake gold.This other trendy place-went around with videocamera saying were shooting a commercail for them as my friend held up objects in front of the camera.

Mall in general-Walked around with suitcase handcuffed to my arm. Some people were scared.

Movie Theater- Saw lots of free movies. Videotaped people coming out of movies, asking them how they felt about the movie, saying I was videotaping a commercial.

Apartments by the Mall- swam in the pools and police man came and kicked us out.

AppleBees- Took lots of free stickers.

Danced on the wall outside of Apllebees as people stared.

Had a fake fight that looked real ouside of the window as people stared.

Pulled out a toy gun on friend that looked real, as people in AppleBees were all shocked, and called the police.

Parking lot-Guy tried to run me and my friend over on his way to the bank, so we went by the bank and took out are real looking toy guns as he sped away later we picked up by cops.

Seriously people I gave up these things, I look at this stuff and I feel like a bad kid, I didn't even mention stealing which I didn't do a lot of. I leave that stuff to professionals like pick pocket Pickering when he ganked me some ginkoba from GNC for half price. That stuff is behind me now.

other-followed and stalked scary terry a local Goth Monster. I knew him but he didn't know me.

Great Nothing

Went around screaming "my nose is melting" with silly putty on my nose talking like Adam Sandler to impress these girls at my school. crowds of people were watching me and this college girl hugged me.

Got free refils from TacoBell with cups from other stores.

Held my own fashion show.

Broke into song and dance singing Tommorrow by Annie which got me kicked out.

Picked out over two dollars worth of coins out of the fountains.

I tipped overlike dominoes six clothes standees by accident.

Danced for Money.

Threw snap in Pops in a Pauly Shore Movie.

Got kicked out of Chuckie Cheese but that's a huge story I'm saving for later.

Yelled Howard Stern out car windows at people.

Dancedf funny in the windows of Fridays, and also played peak a boo with people eating at fridays through the window

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Don't do bad things they'll eventually get you in trouble.

I wasn't able to put down eveything I'll get back to you

later #2

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